Chapter 43: 27I Think Its Because


    It’s morning, the blue lit room is now Ombre, by the orange sun rise.


    Jeff’s house is cold, and quiet. It’s just Jeff, and I, I guess.


    I hug him before I get up from the couch.


    I’m not sure why, I’m up. It’s too cold, and I don’t want to go home, yet. I don’t want to leave him, yet.


    When the furnace kicks in, I walk around.


    I was in the dining room, now. I see photos of Jeff, and his par-ents. Jeff looked younger, he looked


    happier. His parents look perfect. Where were his parents?


    The dining room is decorated with confetti on the table. There are golden wine sses. Deted gold


    and white balloons are scattered onto the floor.


    A cemat read.


    Happy New Years


    I get cold again. I put on my hood before I walk back over to Jeff. He’s still asleep.


    I’m too scared. I want to wake him.


    “Jeff.” He doesn’t move.


    I call him again and stroke his hair. Our heads are touching.


    I’m sitting on the floor now, and stroking his hair, until he moves. I’m pinching my splinter, behind my


    back.


    I kiss him, and he groans. I feel better now.


    “I’m going to go, okay?” I whisper in his ear.


    He nods, it sounds like his soft voice is going to say something. He groans again. He sounds sad. I feel


    bad for leaving.


    I leave before he opens his eyes, before he sees me go. I won’t be able to leave him, if he sees me. If


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    he smiles at me.


    ~~~~~


    When I get home, there’s Emma and Jake in the kitchen again. Emma’s making pancakes, Jakes


    staring at me. The room is silent. Jake’s pping his hands.


    “Sister of the yeardies and gentlemen!” He says.


    Emma’s eyes are glued to me when I walk in. She doesn’tugh at Jake’s joke, she just stares at me. I


    can hear the oil cooking in the pan.


    “Get lost again?” He jokes. I’m notughing. I’m pissed.


    “Fuck you Jake.” I toss my keys on the ind and go upstairs.


    I didn’t care if I hurt Jake. Deep down, I did. I want to apolo-gize, but I don’t.


    I get into my bed and go back to sleep.