Chapter 97
"Do you need me to call a doctor?"
Goddess, now he sounds worried, perfect, Rae. Great job! Why are you like this? Why can''t you just
get up and answer that damn door? Why do you hide away? Be strong, Rae. Tell him the truth, Rae.
Stop being pathetic, Rae.
My stomach begins to bubble up, my chest growing tight. "No," say with a shaky voice, "it''s not..."
Come on, Rae. Come on!
The deep-rooted panic sets in now. It feels as if someone is shoving a towel down my throat.
"Rae? Will you open the door?"
She''s shoving the towel down my throat.
Hesitantly, I unbury myself and walk to the door, cing my hand on the handle, really contemting
this. I bite my lip hard before switching the lock and steadily inching it open, peeking out to look up at
him. I''m sure my cheeks are red and my pajamas look scrambled, but I let out a little smile. "Hi," I
mumble, wiping away all the encumbering thoughts that were tangled in my head just moments ago.
Some things get easier with time and practice.
James'' eyes wander past me, finding the visible pile of clothes on the floor and scene of panic. I inch
the door closed, just enough space for my body. His eyes return to me.
"I just...couldn''t find anything to—well, to wear so," I admit, knowing there''s no point acting normal now.
"It''s ridiculous, right? I''m sorry, I just—I don''t know."
Something of a smile shes on his face. "You''re dressed now, aren''t you?"
I nce down at my pajamas, feeling silly. "Well, yes, but—"
"Thene on, before the food gets cold."
Unsure, I stay in the doorframe until he turns and heads towards the stairs, catching up to him. "James,
I—"
He peers behind, having a perfect view of the mess I am, but he simply carries on. "It''s only dinner,
Rae."
I follow him to the dining room, which I haven''t been in much. Most of the time I ate with Gail and
Theresa in the kitchen, which was less worrying. They chatted about things going on around the pack
and would ask me questions every few exchanges. It was easy.
Two seats are set up on the table, tes and sses and silverware and napkins and steaming food in
front of them. There is one spot at the head of the table and one to the side, and the dimmed
chandelier above sparkles down on it like a dream. Not wanting to sit at the head of the table, I choose
the much morefortable seat and watch as James takes the other.
My heart won''t settle. It feels as if something terrible is about to happen, and I predict it to be my
oing embarrassment.
I sit cross-legged, needing to feel more at home and stopping myself from bobbing my knee. The table
covers the childish action, not worrying me much, and I hesitantly take the fork in my hand, trying to
remember the position my fingers go in. It''s steak and potatoes and grilled vegetables, and the aroma
clouds my nose.
Since I sat down, I haven''t looked at James, but I hear movement from him. My eyes are stuck to my
te, lifting bits of food to my mouth as a squirrel would eat. Nibbling. My hair creates a curtain
between us, but I feel the curtain being pulled back. I look up to James with a flushed face, my
fingernails pressing into my palm. "Are you alright?" He asks, looking rather rxed.
I force a little smile along with a breathyugh sort of sigh. "I''m fine."
"You look tense."
"I, uh—What will you be doing tomorrow?" I attempt, and he gives me a questioning look. "I''ve, um,
always wondered what Alphas do all day."
James'' brows furrow. "Uh, well, I''ll meet with Will in the morning and we''ll talk with themanding
guards, then we might head over to observe training before stopping by the border posts."
I nod,ing up with ns of my own. "That guard, Theodore... I want him to show me around the
pack."
"My personal guard Theodore?" James questions. "Why the specific request?"
"Well, I know him the most. I''ve been around him the most. He''s nice to me. I don''t know, I just prefer
him."
I assume James knows that Theodore''s sister is the green-eyed girl, but I don''t think he knows I do.
"Sure, then. I''ll fetch him tomorrow."
It will be nice to know what''s around me and where everything is, but I am more keen on confronting
her, his sister. There are things I need to know. Her ghost won''t leave me until I get some kind of
closure, and I don''t n on living in a haunted house. "Great," I smile, forking some potatoes.
The conversation stays simple for the rest of dinner, and thankfully, no questions about the past are
asked. Once our tes are clear, Willes out of nowhere and swipes James away, talking about
some rogue at the East border who greatly injured a guard. I stand and watch as they hurry out of the
house, eventually sighing and helping Gail clean up. "Is everything alright, you think?" I ask while
bringing the sses from the table to the sink.
"I''m sure everything is fine. It is not too unusual, I''m afraid," she assures me while taking the sses
from me.
"Is it normal...for him to leave a lot?" I say quietly.
"Well, he is the Alpha. I suppose thates with many responsibilities."
I roll my eyes yfully at her sarcasm. "I know, I know."
After everything is cleaned up, I head upstairs and run a bath. I don''t usually take baths, but something
has put me in the mood for one. Without bubble bath, I substitute in body wash and squeeze out the
N?vel(D)rama.Org''s content.
gel as the faucet runs, watching as the bubbles grow and pile. I lower myself in and graze the bubbles
with my fingers, poking, and smashing them between my hands.
Light pours into the bathroom from the bedroom, giving me a romantic glow. There is a candle on the
counter, but I have no matches or lighter to light it, but this will do. I close my eyes and enjoy the
warmth, wanting to feel as rxed as James was.
I think of him as the water caresses me. I wonder what he is doing. I wonder what he is thinking.
I hope he is thinking of me.