Evander<i>/</i>Havoc’s PO.V
“I really want to ask what happened,” CG groaned the moment Psycho came back from the fitting rooms.
“He probably fucked her,” I grunted, crossing my arms and leaning against the wall.
This shit is so boring. I don’t understand why all of us had toe. The ol‘dies seem to be having the time of their lives, but Blythe has spent most of the time nervous. Not that I give a sh.it. What’s she even
got to be nervous about?
“Obviously you can’t see the veryrge bulge in my jeans, brother,” Psycho teased, giving me a wink.
“Something happened,” CG muttered. “You were gone for a while.”
Psycho looked at Karma. All Karma did was nod once and Psycho blew out a long breath.
“She just needed help with her dress,” he said, not looking at any of us.
“Uht uh,” CG said, shaking his head. “Tell us the truth.”
“I told her that I wouldn’t tell you guys,” he replied.
“I don’t give a sh.it,” Karma said. “Tell us.”
Psycho frowned at him.
“Fine,” he said. “I pretty much shoved her into the fitting room and then spanked her a.ss raw for lying to
me.”
My eyebrows shot up and my back straightened.
“She like it?” CG asked, smirking.
Psycho ran a hand down his face.
“She started acting like a brat so that I’d keep going and then she fu.cking came without any other kind of
stimtion,” he said. “So, yeah, I think she fu.cking liked it.”
“Wow,” I mumbled, a bit shocked. “She really fu.cking came just from being spanked?”
Psycho’s eyes flickered <i>to </i>the ground, and he nodded like he was lost in the memory of it.
“And she didn’t beg <i>you </i>to fu.ck her after?” CG asked with a raised brow.
“I mean, not really,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck. “Things kind of got… intense after.”
“Intense how?” Karma asked.
“I identally made her cry,” he blurted.
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< Chapter 49 Self Hate
CG gave him a death re.
“We’re supposed to be moving forward, Psycho!” he hissed.
* Ponsa 7
“Look, I didn’t mean to, it was just…” He trailed off, looking around before stepping closer to us. “Look, she insinuated that I would force her to return the favor in some way, and it pi.ssed me off. I kinda blew up, but… The way she looked at me… It was like she didn’t understand. I thought that maybe she thought because I was a dirty biker, that I would ra.pe a girl. So… I kinda threw that in her face.”
“Well, she’s the one that called us all trashy, dirty, scummy, pig–headed, bikers<b>,” </b>I grumbled. “She said we were criminals. I’m sure she did think that about you.”
“Yeah, that’s the thing,” Psycho replied, looking past us. “She didn’t think that at all.”
“She tell you that?” Karma asked.
“Yeah,” Psycho said. “I couldn’t… I couldn’t just walk away while she was crying like that. After she calmed down a little, I asked her what she thought of the club. Her eyes lit up the way they used to when she would talk about us bing patched–in members… It was like we were 14 again, and she was rambling
on about our road names.”
“And your conclusion?” CG pushed.
“That Daniel’s a lying sack of sh.it, and he’d better never show his face in front of us again,” Psycho stated
coldly.
I gulped, suddenly feeling nauseous.
“How do we know Daniel was lying?” I asked. “It’s not like Bly ever talked to us. She was too busy with her
new friends, spending her daddy’s money.”
“Yeah, I’m not so sure about that,” Karma said. “Not after the way she snapped at Mast night.”
“What? For what?” I asked.
“For calling Daniel her dad,” Karma stated.
“She had a breakdownst night too,” CG added sadly. “She begged me not to make her go back. Pleaded
with me <i>to </i>not make her go back to… wherever. She even called me Tae. It took me a minute to calm her
down.”
Back where? Her husband, or her dad? It can’t be her dad. Can’t. <fn2caf> For more chapters visit FindN0vel</fn2caf>
“What the fu.ck ever,” I grunted, annoyed.
That can’t be true. It can’t be. Had to be a fu.cking trick. It had to be.
“She was hyperventting and almost passed out,” CG told me, frowning.
Fu.ck.
“Something more is goin on,” Karma stated. “We’re gonna find out what.”
Chapter 49 Self Hate
That made me nervous. He nervous. Because I have a secret that none of them know. Blythe knows. As
far as she knows, it’s not a secret at all. If they keep insisting on having her around… if they start to dig… if
Blythe starts to open up… They’ll all find out the truth.
“Ma thinks that the abuse started with Daniel,” Karma told us, and my blood ran cold.
What? No. Absolutely not.
“No way,” I denied immediately. Because it can’t be true.
“Wake up, Havoc,” CGined. “Look at the signs. I know you’re pissed, and you have this whole weird
thing about being her stepbrother, but fu.ck! Our girl is hurting, and she needs our help.”
“Please Evander! Please just let me… let me talk to <i>my </i>mom!”
“No, you’re leaving <i>right </i>now!”
“P–p–please Evander… p–please… I—I can’t go <i>back </i><i>there</i><i>… </i>Please<i>… </i><i>I’ll </i><i>stay </i>away from all of you. H’ll leave
Everly alone… please don’t make me <i>go </i><i>back </i><i>there</i>…”
“You don’t belong here <i>and </i><i>nobody </i>wants <i>you </i><i>here</i><i>, </i><i>Blythe</i>. <i>Time </i><i>to </i><i>go</i><i>.</i><i>” </i>
“Please don’t! P<i>–</i><i>p</i>–<i>p</i><i>–</i>please<i>! </i><i>I’m </i><i>begging </i><i>you</i><i>! I </i>c–c–<i>can’t</i><i>!</i>”
“Just go and get out of <i>our </i><i>lives</i><i>! </i><i>Never </ie <i>back </i><i>here</i>!”
“We need to keep up with what we’re doin,” Karma said, pulling me from my dark thoughts. “She’ll trust us
enough to tell us, or we’ll find out on our own.”
“You guys do what you want,” I grumbled, walking away. “I want no part of it.”
I can’t have any part of it. Because I have to keep telling myself that Blythe is a li.ar and that my friends are
wrong. Because if it ever turned out that they were right….
I’m not sure if I could live with myself after what I did to her.
The rest of the shopping trip was just as dumb and boring. For a while, I tried to do everything I could to
convince myself that Blythe was a lying sack of sh.it. When I had sessfully done that, I had also convinced myself that if I kept a close enough eye on her, I’d see it. A small change, a smirk, conniving
eyes.
Something.
Anything.
But I didn’t see a damn thing. If anything, all the attention made her more ufortable than it used to. She was stiff and awkward. She tried to smile andugh with the ol‘dies, but it was forced. Anytime CG
or Karma would touch her, she’d frown and try to push them away. It didn’t make sense to me.
Maybe she knew I was watching. Maybe she was just good at ying a part. Maybe she was nervous
<Chapter 49 Self Hate
about slipping up in front of the ol‘dies.
Or maybe my friends had a point. Maybe they were right. Maybe I’m the world’s biggest piece of sh.it. Maybe I fucked up beyond repair. Way beyond.
“What’s going on with youtely?” Everly said as she strolled into my room.
Fu.ck!
Posts
We just got back from that stupid shopping trip. I booked it to my room the moment Karma started talking about night–shift duty for Blythe. I escaped one headache for a fucking other.
“What do you mean?” I asked my twin, not really looking at her as I moved around my room.
I need a fucking drink.
“You’ve barely talked to me since Blythe showed up,” Ev whined and stomped her foot like a child. “She’s stealing you away from me again. All of you.”
“First off, I’d barely seen her, and we all had that rule to ignore her up until like two days ago,” I said. “And secondly, all of us? What are you even fu.cking saying Ev? I’m your twin, but the guys? Those are <i>my </i>friends, not yours. They never gave you the time of day before.”
“Well, that’s just a lie,” Everly stated, sticking her nose in the air. “Karma and I have been seeing each other for a while. He just wanted to wait to tell you. He was afraid you’d be upset since you two are so close.”
I scoffed out augh. Yeah, close enough to know that she’s full of sh.it. The only reason Karma has even
tolerated Everly since we’ve been adults is because she’s my twin and a club princess. It’s purely out of
respect for those two things.
“Yeah, okay,” I replied sarcastically.
“It’s true,” Ev insisted, stomping her foot again.
“Ev, be for real,” I said, giving her a look. “I know Karma. He’s never been interested in you. He’d never even
fu.ck you.”
“But he’d fu.ck Blythe!? Is that what you’re saying?!” She shouted, fuming.
“Yeah actually,” I replied, chuckling. “That’s exactly what I’m saying.” Because it was true. Very obviously
true.
Everly screeched and stomped out of my room. I shook my head, not giving a sh.it. I can’t deal with her
right now. I’ve been avoiding her just like I’ve been avoiding Blythe.
After seeing that video… it’s hard not to look back and see what Everly was doing. I’d like to think that I’d always have my twin’s back, but… I also never thought Ev was a truly cruel person. Until recently, that is. <i>Now </i>I’m questioning everything and I hate it.
I want <i>to </i>drown my thoughts out. I need to. I need a break, a breather. I need to stop thinking about those electric eyes and <i>how </i>many times I’ve made them cry. I need to stop thinking about the possibility that I
Chapter 49: Self Hate
really, truly, unforgivably fu.cked up eight years ago.
Fu.ck, I hate myself.
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