<b>Chapter </b>96


    61


    55 vouchers


    I never talked about the day that my lover died because… well, I was too ashamed and guilty to talk about it.


    She didn’t just die because I knotted in her<b>; </b>she died because I lost control.


    I remember the pain in her eyes at thosest moments. I barely remember what she looks like or the color of her eyes, but I remember the look in them–that look of fear.


    And asionally I question myself if what I really felt for her was love or just the idea of her. The idea that even though she knew what I was, she still loved me, still clung to me like she might die if she let go.


    She did die, but she did so clinging to me.


    I sighed, blowing out the smoke. “Why am I even thinking about this?” I asked myself, looking up at the sky and inhaling another smoke.


    I was on the balcony where Rosette and I had talked that night and I had kissed her. My hand moved absentmindedly and touched my lips and I could almost feel her lips on mine.


    “Get a grip, man,” I grumbled, dropping my hand. I was about to put out the smoke when my phone rang. I looked down and grimaced, my jaw clenched. Nothing good ever came out when he called me directly.


    I picked up the call, putting the phone on speaker.


    “Kade,” his voice carried through, low and controlled and it made me angry for no reason. “Dinner at seven. Just you.”


    Oh, this wasn’t good.


    “Yes, Father.”


    He ended the call and I picked up another smoke.


    This wasn’t good at all.


    “The old man wants me to have dinner with him,” I said to Kross <b>as </b>soon as I stepped back to the house.


    He raised his head from his head, his eyebrows furrowed. “Shit.”


    Shit, indeed.


    “I can’t even begin to guess what he wants,” I grumbled, resting my head on the couch and staring up at the ceiling. “Ss is the definition of unpredictable.”


    “Hopefully it’s not something you can’t handle.”


    <b>I </b>sighed, deep and weighted. We fell silent after that, the soft clicking of Kross’sptop filling the space.


    “It doesn’t feelplete without him,” <b>I </b>whispered, my eyes still fixed on the ceiling.


    <b>9:19 </b><b>Mon</b><b>, </b>Sep <b>15 </b>


    :


    <b>61 </b>


    <b>55 </b>vouchers


    Kross’s typing stopped and I felt his eyes on me but I didn’t look back at him. “It’s always been the three <b>of </b><b>us</b>. <b>It’ll </b>take some time to get used to his absence. And it’s not as if we were going to stay with each other forever.”


    I nodded, my chest tight. I looked over at Kross and our eyes met. “You’ve changed.”


    He just shrugged, going back to his typing.


    He really has changed, in more ways than one. And I knew the reason, but we’ve had an unspoken agreement not to talk about it, for Axel’s sake.


    <b>*** </b>


    I adjusted the cuffs of my sleeve as I stepped into the house, nodding to Gabriel.


    The ce was back to normal as if it had never been destroyed, everything back to the way it was, reced by the same things that were destroyed.


    The house was the same, it just looked new.


    I knew Ss was already in the dining room so I just headed there directly, fighting the urge to keep my hand away from my cuffs.


    “Kade,” he said as soon as I stepped in, sitting at the head of the table, with a buffet spread on the table even though it was just the two of us.


    “Father,” I nodded <i>at </i>him as <b>I </b>sat beside him.


    “Let’s eat first,” he said, picking up


    his


    spoon.


    We ate in silence, my head a mess, my tongue not tasting anything, the food settling like lead in my stomach.


    Why couldn’t Ss ever go straight to the point? It would be appreciated at this moment. Finally, dinner was done and he leaned back on his chair, wiping his mouth with a napkin.


    I looked at him, an eyebrow raised.


    He cleared his throat. “Right. The reason you’re here. I’m sure you’re aware that I’ve been trying to seal a deal with an Italianpany that deals in weapons.”


    I nodded. That was what I told Axel, and I suspected that those Italians wanted something and that’s why the deal was dragging on.


    I&G Dynamics. That was thepany’s name.


    “Good,” Ss continued. “Axel was the reason the whole deal was dragging out, but now that that foolish boy is out of the question, it’s falling on you.”


    Shit. Shit. Shit!! I swallowed, trying to force the bile that was rising down.


    “To seal this deal with this powerfulpany, Kade, we’re allying through marriage.”


    <b>9:19 </b>Mon<b>, </b><b>Sep </b>15 ..


    Shit!


    I went still, just staring at him.


    Marriage. Fucking marriage.


    Wow, I didn’t see thising. I would have never predicted this.


    “Axel was supposed to be the one sitting here, not you.”


    61


    E55 vouchers


    As he said that, my mind and messy thoughts took a dark turn. Why Axel? Why did he sound so disappointed as he said that? Axel was the first choice, the better choice, and I was just the alternative he had no choice but to go with?


    “This is a very important deal, Kade. We’re going to see this through.”


    I couldn’t say I was the ck sheep of the family–no, that was more like Axel–but I could say I was the one who stuck out like a sore thumb. The quiet one, the one who would rather be in his head than talk with other people who weren’t my brothers.


    “We’ll be seeing the daughter before the wedding at least once. There will be an engagement party, but it will just be something small. Formal.”


    Axel had bite, he rebelled, and even though Father hated it, he still epted it, because a man who fought back was good enough for him. But the one who stayed silent and remained distant? Who kept his head down? Uneptable.


    <b>“</b>Are you even listening to me, Kade?”


    Mother. God, I missed her more today. I wanted her to hold me like she always did. I wanted to let out my emotions in her arms<b>. </b>


    “Kade!”


    I wanted her to tell me there was nothing wrong with being quiet, and just wanting some peace in my head.


    Ss mmed his palms on the table, standing up. “Kade!”


    “Yes, sir,” I answered, blinking at him, my voice t and emotionless. “I hear you.”


    “Good.” He sat back, his eyes fixed on mine. “You won’t ruin this like that foolish boy. You’ll act on your responsibility.”


    I wanted to scoff. Responsibilities. Duties. That was what we were to Ss. Tools.


    “Are we done here?<b><i>” </i></b>I asked, already getting to my feet.


    He nodded. “Anything you need to know will be sent to your email.”


    I said nothing<b>, </b>didn’t even nod and just stood up, heading towards the door.


    Fuck!