“No. But I don’t want to cause trouble.” She squeezes Gianni’s hands. “Please, don’t do something stupid because of me.”
“All right, sweetheart.” He cups the back of her skull in one hand and kisses her forehead again while looking over her head at Roger.
Their eyes meet, and even though I’m not a mind reader, I know Christopher’s days are numbered<b>. </b>The thought of a murder being decided that easily, without using words, makes me shiver, but <b>I </b>can’t find it in me to care, not after what Christopher did to her. He doesn’t deserve to live. I wish I could kill him myself.
“Let’s get you home.” Gianni helps her to her feet but gently hands her off to Roger. “He’ll take you to the garage, and I’ll help Caterina get your things together.”
There goes the pit in my stomach. For Tatiana’s sake, I put on a brave face until she’s out of the suite, and I can let out the breath I was holding. Now it’s just the two of us. Nobody’s here to protect me. Nobody to keep me from throwing myself into his arms and begging him to love me. Having him this close has stripped away every reason I had for running. I can’t afford to forget what staying with him means, no matter how my heart wants to.
His stormy eyes threaten to knock me on my ass<b>, </b>but I hold my ground. “I didn’t know it was like that,” I whisper before he can ask. “I didn’t know he did that to her.”
“I believe you.” He folds his arms, looking me up and down. “What? No argument?”
“About…?”
“About killing that bastard for what he did to somebody I love. You’re not going to tell me how wrong it is or run away again?” “Gianni.” I sink into an armchair close to the window overlooking the city. It’s a beautiful suite in a beautiful hotel, and I’ve spent a miserable day in it. All I want is to go home and forget this happened, but he’s not going to make it that easy.
“Well?”
“You tracked my phone without me knowing about it.” His face is stony. He doesn’t even have the decency to look sorry. “I’ve been living in a cage most of my life. When my mom died, my dad doubled down on protection. I couldn’t make a move without him hovering over my shoulder. Over the years, I grew to resent him<b>, </b>and at times, I’ve even hated him. It ruined my rtionship with him, and when I got my own ce<b>, </b>I promised I wouldn’t go back to living like that.”
I sigh. “I don’t want to grow to resent or hate you. You have to let me live.”
“What about my cruel protectiveness saving your life?” he counters with a sneer. “It came in handyst night. I’m a bad man. I warned you of that and won’t apologize for what I did to him.”
“I’m not asking you to. But I’m asking you to apologize for viting my privacy–again.”
He sps his hands behind his back and paces in front of the sofa. can’t take my eyes off those hands, cienching and rxing rhythmically. Hands that could snap a neck with no problem. Hands that have brought me great pleasure.
<b>“</b><b>If </b>you’re wondering,” I add in a soft voice, “it’sforting, knowing I have you to defend me. It’s a little scary too, but it’sforting.”
<b>He </b>snorts, shaking his head while wearing a groove in the throw <b>rug </b>under his feet. “d I have your approval.”
“I’m trying, Gianni. Meet me halfway?”
“That’s not how I work. I won’tpromise<b>.</b>”
<b>61 </b>
“Then that’s it.” My chest aches. It hurts more than <b>I </b>can stand. He might as well tear out my beating heart and stomp on <b>it</b>. This is where we end. Because I’m not living in a dictatorship. <b>If </b>you want me with you–where I want to be, so much<b>—</b>you have to give <b>me </b><b>space</b><b>. </b>I’m yours, but I don’t belong to you. I belong to the. I love you… but I love myself too.”
<b>I </b>can’t believe <b>the </b>words slipped from my mouth so easily. I’m almost shocked. Not by the meaning. I’ve been <b>falling </b>for fil
for awhile, but the impact they have on us, ifweeven exist anymore
Seconds tick by, and I almost wonder if he heard me. “You love me?” His voice is a sharp jagged whisper. All I can do is nod, the lump in my throat making it hard for me to speak. He <b>crosses </b>the space between us stopping in front of me. “I want you toe home. With me. <b>To </b>stay.<b>” </b>
“That’s what I want too.”
“I can’t change the man I am. I’m always going to want to own you I’ll always want you at my side–and when you aren’t there, I’ll want to know where you are. I’ll always want to know who you’re with or what you’re doing. I can’t loosen my grip all at once.”
His gaze locks with mine, and now I’m seeing another side of him I never knew existed. He’s worried. Anxious. Almost pleading with his eyes. “I can’t promise I’ll always do the right thing, but I need you to remember I’m trying. All I want is you. If it means learning to lessen my grasp, I’ll do my best. I’ll fucking try, but I can’t lose you<b>.</b><b>” </b>
“Really?” A tear rolls down my cheek, then another one.
“Juste home. Let’s get the hell out of here and start over again.” Finally, he allows himself to reach for me, and as soon as his palms press against my cheeks my entire body bursts into mes. “Because if I have to go another minute without being inside of you, I might lose my mind. I need you, Caterina.”
That’s all I needed to hear tounch me out of the chair and into his arms. All the doubt and regret I wrestled with today melts away and leaves nothing but relief. “I want toe home.”
“Thank God.” He pulls me close enough that I can feel the rapid beating of his heart against my chest. He can be as stoic as he wants, but the thumping of his heart gives away what’s going on inside, and that’s enough for me.