Chapter 211


    Chapter Two Hundred Eleven


    Sephie


    “You were talking in your sleep, solnishko. You don’t remember?” he asked, now clearly worried.


    I thought for a moment. “I don’t remember anything. What did I say?”


    “You were pleading with the doctor, trying to convince him not to do the procedure,” he said. His face


    looked almost haunted.


    “Shi t. I’m sorry,” I said, ncing around the room. Chris and Keith were gone, but the guys were still


    there.


    “Why would you ever apologize for that, princess?” Ivan asked.


    “Because I saw what hearing me on the ne did to all of you. You guys don’t need to carry the burden


    of all my trauma.” I nced at Misha, who was clearly struggling. It suddenly hit me why he was


    struggling. “Especially Misha, who’s still beating himself up for teasing me about being pregnant, even


    though he had no idea when he said it.” His face turned red as he tried to control his emotions. He was


    staring at the floor, his elbows on his knees, trying to maintain control. I quietly got off the couch and


    leaned over his back. “Don’t make me bring back the emotional support sloth,” I said, as I draped


    myself over his upper body, I whispered to him, so only he could hear, “I still love you, my adorable


    Russian guardian. You didn’t know. I can’t be mad at you. I couldn’t be mad at that face anyway. Like


    it’s physically impossible you’re so adorable.”


    He reached up and held onto my arms that were around his neck as heughed. I kissed his cheek.


    “Promise you’ll stop beating yourself up?” He nodded. “Good. Because my hands still hurt, so I don’t


    want to beat you up for real over this.”


    Adrik stood up from the couch, holding his hand out for me, e, we should go soak your hands


    again.” He still had a look of worry on his face, but he was trying to mask it. I walked back to him, still


    feeling guilty for what I’d clearly just put them all through. He wrapped his arm around my waist and


    pulled me, almost urgently, toward the door.


    “Sorry for the unnned andpletely unnecessary entertainment everyone,” I said as we walked


    quickly out of his office. I was a little taken aback by Adrik’s behavior. Once we were on the elevator, I


    looked up at him. “Is everything okay?” He was silent for the short ride up to the penthouse, his jaw


    clenched. He still hadn’t said a word as we walked into the penthouse. I followed him to the kitchen.


    “Adrik?”


    He finally sighed and looked at me. He looked hurt. “It’s not okay, Sephie. How long have you been


    struggling with these memories?”


    “I mean, since it happened? What do you mean?” I asked.


    “You try to carry all of this… this hurt by yourself. It’s not fair that you only share the best parts of


    yourself with me, but shu t me out when you’re hurting. I love you, Sephie. All of you. The best parts of


    you, the worst parts of you, the parts of you that like to be bratty just to get a reaction. I love all of you.


    You can’t keep shutting me out except when you’re happy.” he said. He was tense. He was leaning on


    the counter, gripping the edge of it with both hands like he was trying to crush the granite.


    “I didn’t know I was talking in my sleep. I don’t remember anything. I didn’t intentionally shu t you out,” I


    said, quietly. I was confused by his reaction, which meant I didn’t know how to react. I just stood there,


    for once, not having the slightest clue on what to do. I didn’t realize that I hadpletely zoned out


    until Adrik was standing in front of me.


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    “You’re doing it again,” he said. His voice was softer, but there was still a look of concern In his eyes.


    “Doing what?” I asked,pletely confused.


    “Where was your mind just then?” he asked, looking more concerned.


    “I don’t know. It was nk. I told you I didn’t intentionally shu t you out, then I had no clue what to do,


    then you were standing in front of me,” I said. I was starting to feel anxious. I could feel myself getting


    more upset by the second.


    He cursed under his breath. “Sephie, it’s been five minutes. Youpletely zoned out. I had to touch


    you to get you to snap out of it.”


    I suddenly felt like he was mad at me, like he thought I was doing this on purpose. I took a step back


    from him. “I didn’t know!” I said, the tears started to fall. “I’m not doing it on purpose.” I crossed my


    arms across my chest, shutting my eyes to try and keep the tears from falling.


    I felt his arms around me, his lips on my forehead. “Sephie, has this ever happened before? Can you


    remember ever losing time before?” I nodded my head. “Did it happen after that night in the basement


    with your uncle?” His voice was much softer now. His hands running lightly over my back, trying to


    comfort me. I nodded my head again. “Did it happen after the forced procedure?”


    “I don’t remember. Maybe. That’s when things got really bad at my uncle’s house. I don’t remember a


    ton of extra details,” 1 said quietly.


    “Makes sense,” he said as he pulled me further into the kitchen.


    “What makes sense?” I asked. I was stillpletely lost. He nced at me as he turned the hot water


    on, pouring Epsom salt into the bowl. His face softeningpletely as he looked down at me.


    “You’re extra cute when you’re confused, just so you know. You get this doe-eyed look that practically


    makes you irresistible,” he said, his sexy smirk on his face.


    “I don’t know about that, but I’m definitely confused,” I said. He walked to the other side of the ind


    and grabbed one of the chairs and brought it back to where I was standing.


    “Sit,” he said, as he grabbed the bowl and set it in front of me. He remained in front of me, his fingers


    ying with my curls. while I looked at my hands in the bowl of hot water. “Your brain zones out


    because it’s trying to protect you from reliving those memories. I’ve caught you doing it several times


    since Monday, but I didn’t think you were truly zoning out until just now. Your brain rarely stops, so I just


    assumed you were deep in thought.”


    “You have?” I asked, surprised.


    He nodded. “Earlier today, even. When we were soaking your hands thest time. Then when you fell


    asleep in my office, you started talking. You only ever talk in your sleep when something’s wrong. You


    started to struggle and I was worried you were back in the same nightmare loop, but you started


    pleading for them not to take your uterus. You were screaming at one point.”


    I felt the tears falling. I kept looking at my hands. “I’m really sorry. I didn’t mean to.” I could remember


    being in the clinic, begging for the doctor not to do the procedure. He waspletely indifferent to my


    pleas. He acted like he didn’t even hear


    me.