Chapter 21


    Ch 21 Devastated


    ric was sitting at Thea’s desk, staring into space.


    Kai was sitting on the floor, leaning against her bed. He had a ck eye, swollen nose, busted lip. His


    knuckles were a bloody mess. So were his clothes.


    Conri was on Thea’s bed clutching her pillows, breathing in her scent, and sobbing.


    They all turned and looked at her, pain in their eyes.


    “What happened?” Thea said, worry in her voice. She thought maybe there had been a rogue attack


    and someone died.


    Conri jumped off the bed, ran to her, spilled onto his knees, and hugged her as tight as he could. “


    Please don’t leave us,” he sobbed. “Please. I’1l be better.”


    “What? I’m not going anywhere. What’s going on?” She put her hands around him, trying tofort


    him. She couldn’t remember ever seeing him cry. He was impulsive and wild, but he wasn’t acrier. °


    Kai wouldn’t talk. It was like the fight had left him. ‘


    “We didn’t handle today very well,” ric said. His voice was full of pain. It hurt Thea to hear it. She


    could tell he was doing his duty because he always would, but he sounded like it was killing him.


    “What happened?” Thea said.


    “You left us,” Conri said. She could barely make out his words through his sobs.


    She knelt down and held him. “What are you talking about, Con? I’m right here.”


    ric stood up and walked to the door. “I’m d you’ re back safe,” he said.


    “Ric?”


    He left. Thea turned to Conri.


    “You’re a mess, Con. Come on, let’s get you cleaned up,” she said. She coaxed him to the bathroom


    while he clung to her. She got his clothes off and him into the shower. She washed him, then held him.


    He kept whispering, “Please don’t leave,” between sobs until he eventually calmed under her touch.


    “Tell me what’s wrong, Con.”


    “I don’t want to lose you.”


    “You’re not.”


    “You’re mine, Thea. I need you.”


    “I need you too, Con.”


    “Do you want to be with other people?”


    “No! Con, I want to be with you forever. I missed you today. I couldn’t wait toe home and be with


    you.”


    He nuzzled into her neck. “I missed you so much. My heart hurt with you so far away. It drove me crazy


    thinking you were going to kiss her. It wasn’t jealousy. I was afraid you would like it and leave us.”


    “Con, I’ll never leave you, and I didn’t kiss her. I thought about it since you guys wanted me to, but the


    thought made me sick. I missed you guys too much. I don’t want to be with anyone else.”


    “Really?”


    “Yeah. The longer and further away I got from you guys, the more it hurt. The more I] wanted toe


    back and be with you. I love you, Conri.” It was the first time she had said it.


    He took her face in his hands. “I love you more.” She smiled. “All this because I was gone for a few


    hours?”


    “It wasn’t just a few hours. You don’t believe we’re mates. We know Misty wants you. You have no


    reason not to date other people.”


    “Except for one big reason. I don’t want to date anyone else,” Thea said.


    Conri buried his face in her neck. “My dad was right. We’re weak without you.”


    “He didn’t say you were weak. He said you’re stronger around me.”


    “I felt weak. I felt empty. Like my chest was a gaping hole.”


    “ve never seen you cry, Con.”


    “I’ve never had a good enough reason to cry,” he said. “I can’t bear the thought of not having you. I


    wouldn’t want to live.”


    “Don’t talk like that,” Thea said. “I need you alive and with me, okay?” She ran her hand through his


    hair. “Con, are you okay?”


    “I’m better than I was. I still miss you.”


    She squeezed him. “1’ll hold you until you don’t.” “Then you’ll be holding me forever.”


    “I’m okay with that,” Thea said.


    “Me too.” He nuzzled against her.


    “Before we start forever, I need to check on Kaiand get ric back.”


    “I know.”


    “Will you be okay without me for a bit?” Thea said.


    “As long as you’reing back.”


    “Always.”


    Kai was gone when they got out of the shower. They got dressed, and Thea put Conri to bed. She


    followed Kai’s scent to his old room, knocked softly, and walked in. She sat next to him on the bed. He


    was holding one of her pillows, breathing in her scent.


    “Im sorry, Kai. If [knew what this would do to you, I wouldn’t have done it. Maybe we all should have


    gone together.”


    “I won’t stop you from living your life,” Kai said. “I won’t fight with you anymore. I’1l be better, I promise.


    You deserve to be happy.”


    “Im happy with you, Kai. I like fighting with you. I love you exactly how you are. I don’t want you to


    change.”


    “You love me?” Kai said softly.


    “I’ve always loved you.”


    “I didn’t drive you away?”


    “No, Kai. Where is thising from?”


    “Why do you feel the need to spend time away from us?” ‘


    “I don’t. [hate being away from you guys.”


    “Did you kiss her?”


    “No,” Thea said.


    Kai looked at her.


    “I couldn’t kiss her when I was aching for you. I don’t ever want to kiss anyone else. The thought makes


    me ill.”


    He put his hand on her leg. “I love you too,” Kai said.


    “I never thought I’d hear you say that to me,” Thea said, a smile growing on her face.


    “I’ve felt it forever. I’ve wanted to say it to you every day for years. Whether you were mad, happy,


    fighting me, orughing with me. It was so hard to keep it in. I love you, Thea. You’re the only thing in


    this world that I want.”


    “I used to think you hung out with me because I challenged you. You were driven to beat me. That was


    the allure.”


    “I don’t want to beat you,” Kai said. “I want to be with you.”


    She took the pillow from him, set it down, then maneuvered so she was straddling hisp.


    “Pm with you. I’m right here,” Thea said. They wrapped their arms around each other. “What happened


    to your face and hands?”


    “I picked some fights,” Kai said.


    “You never get tagged in a fight. Did you purposely let people hit you?” Kai shrugged. “ Why?”


    “I wanted to feel something besides the pain of losing you.”


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    She pulled back to look him in the eyes. “You didn’t lose me.”


    “It felt like it. We’ ve made too many mistakes with you. Not letting other guys near you. Being too


    possessive. Waiting too long to tell you how we feel. Ithought we messed it all up.”


    He looked at her with sad eyes. She kissed his nose, then his forehead, cheeks, and chin, then worked


    her way down his neck, saying his name between kisses. His hands caressed her back then he hugged


    her tight.


    “I can’t bear the thought of losing you,” he said. “ I’m willing to do anything to get you to stay. Pll be


    whatever you want me to be.”


    “You’re all worked up over nothing, Kai. I’m not going anywhere. You don’t have to do anything except


    be yourself. I want you, just as you are, forever.”


    “You love me?”


    “I love you, Kai.”


    He nuzzled her neck. “I love you so much. I want to make you happy. I want you to want me.”


    “I want you, Kai. Goddess, I go crazy thinking about you ending up with a mate that isn’t me. I couldn’t


    watch you be with someone else. I would have to leave the pack.”


    He squeezed her tighter. “You’re not allowed to leave. Iwon’t let you. You’re my mate, Thea, and I’m


    yours.”


    She ran her fingers through his hair and breathed in his scent.


    “I really want to be,” she said.


    “You’ll see when we shift.”


    “Are you okay?”


    He nodded.


    “Will youe back to our room? You don’t belong in here anymore,” she said.


    He stood up, keeping his hold on her. She wrapped her legs around his waist and let him carry her to


    her room. 2


    “ I need to go get ric,” she said.


    He nodded and set her down. She made sure he climbed into her bed before walking out the door. 2