Chapter 55


    55.A Cold Morning YILEYNA


    I awoke to find the bed empty, feeling a pang of pain inside of me. I know he had a lot to do, but I did


    wish I could at least wake up to him next to me, even if it was just asionally.


    My entire body felt sore and achy, yet the lightness that I felt in my chest was immeasurable.


    A smile yed on my lips and my cheeks burned as I thought ofst night. It had been different, and


    even if I was blindfolded, it only heightened my other senses. I felt as if we had somehow be closer.


    It was almost as if we had opened ourselves to one another in an entirely new way.


    I was sure Theon felt something much more for me than he admitted. He couldn’t put it into words, but I


    was positive he was falling for me. I smiled happily, hugging the nket to my chest. He had cleaned me


    too. No one did that unless they truly cared. I closed my eyes for a moment, feeling utterly happy and


    content. My Theon… just like I was his… My heart leapt when I heard the sound of movement in the


    other room, and I jolted upright, wincing at how sore my behind and core felt.


    He was home!


    I kicked the nket off and quickly got out of bed, almost falling over my legs that felt like jelly. I opened


    the drawer to grab a shirt or something to put on, when I realised it was half empty. I frowned. Most of


    Theon’s clothes were missing… Feeling confused, I pulled on a t-shirt before I closed the wardrobe and


    pulled the curtains open. The window was entirely frosted, and from what I could see outside, the snow


    was still falling strongly and it was extremely windy. I stripped the bedding, the stains fromst night a


    reminder of everything that we had done here. I don’t think I’ll be able toe into this room without


    remembering it. My heart skipped a beat as I held the bundled bedding in my arms and made my way to


    the bedroom door


    I opened it, to see Theon standing over a trunk, wearing ck pants and a ck shirt, which hung open,


    and his hair brushed back. He turned his gorgeous amber eyes towards where i stood, his eyes trailing


    over me, and I could feel my cheeks burning up under his gaze. It was almost as if he was undressing


    me entirely, and the shirt I was wearing suddenly felt too small…


    My heart skipped a thousand beats when our eyes locked. “Morning.” I said, my stomach all fluttery.


    “Morning.” He replied, his deep sexy voice making me feel giddy. Goddess, what was going on? I was


    feeling even more nervous than usual… He turned back to the trunk and tossed in some clothes. I


    frowned, remembering the wardrobe that was partially empty.


    “Are you going somewhere?” I asked, walking over to him.


    There was over a foot difference in height between us, and although I wanted to pull him down and kiss


    him, he had turned back to the trunk.


    “I’m going to be moving to the castle for a while. I have to take the Beta title soon. The ceremony should


    being up and then my workload will increase. It makes sense for me to take up my old room at the


    castle.” He replied, his voice emotionless and cold. My stomach sank at those words, and deep down I


    wondered if he’d invite me too. “So, do you mean permanently?” I asked, taking the clothes he was


    shoving in and beginning to fold them.


    My eyes fell to the red welts on my arms where he had tied me up. They were fading, yet the reminder of


    what happened remained. Making an illicit desire throb in my lower regions.


    “Pretty much, you can keep staying here. No one will remove you.” I froze, my heart thundering at what


    he had just said. Why did that sound like… It didn’t sound right.


    “You’re speaking as if you might not evene back here.” I replied lightly, raising an eyebrow


    He looked down at me. Reaching up with his hand, he cupped the left side of my face, brushing his


    thumb over my cheek.


    “Who knows.” He smirked arrogantly.


    I frowned.


    “That’s mean.” I huffed, pushing his hand off. His smirk had eased me. “I’m sure you’lle to see me at


    least.” “Hmm, well you are a beautiful distraction.” My heart skipped a beat. “I’m d I am.” I replied


    softly.


    N?vel(D)ra/ma.Org exclusive ? material.


    His smirk vanished and he frowned.


    “Although I will be busy over at the castle, I do want to see if we can push to awaken whatever you are


    and maybe your shift… without anyone else knowing.” ! My unease vanished and I nodded, internally


    scolding myself for feeling paranoid.


    “Thanks, I’d appreciate that.”


    Our eyes met and stepping closer, I reached up, locking my arms around his neck and pressing


    my entire body into his. My heart pounded as I felt him tense, but it wasn’t even a split secondter when


    his hands wrapped around my waist and he stood up straight, lifting me off the groundpletely and


    crushing me against him. I smiled, kissing his jaw softly. He nudged my face away, kissing my neck


    sensually instead. I resisted a moan and his hold on me tightened before he inhaled deeply, burying his


    nose in the crook of my neck For a few moments, he didn’t move. I wrapped my legs around his waist,


    enjoying his embrace and the steady beat of his heart. He exhaled slowly and ced me down.


    “Are you going now?” I asked as he continued to put his things into the trunk. “Yeah, I’ll be leaving. Don’t


    wait for me, alright? I won’t being back” I suddenly felt cold inside, but I nodded.


    He mmed the trunk shut and closed the buttons of his shirt before he put on one of his big coats.


    “Every evening at ten o’clock, down by the White Dove, starting tomorrow, meet me there.” I nodded,


    feeling a sh of confusion. Why was he acting like that was the only time he’d see


    me..?


    He picked up the sack and trunk, and walked towards the door. Stopping, he ced something on the


    shelf by the front door before opening the door. Instantly the howling wind became louder, and I flinched


    as the st of bitter cold rushed through the cabin. Theon stepped out and pulled his trunk out behind


    him, he paused for a moment as I walked over to the door.


    “See you…” I said softly.


    He didn’t reply, and after a moment, he walked off in the deep snow. I watched him until I could no longer


    see him, and closed the door to the cabin, locking it.


    This was… strange… Was he really gone? Not all the higher-ups lived in the castle… Sure it was easier,


    but the sudden n to move there…


    I turned to the shelf, wondering what he had put there. Pushing aside the small box that stood on the


    shelf, my heart sank when my gaze fell on the key. The key to the cabin… I looked at the door, my heart


    thundering as I realised both keys were here. Why did he leave his key? Fear enveloped me and I


    unlocked the door, running out into the snow in nothing but the shirt I was wearing “Theon!” I shouted,


    but my voice was drowned out by the howling wind. “Theon!” Surely, he’ll hear me! He couldn’t have


    gotten far with his luggage. I looked down at the snow covered ground that was eleven inches deep and


    saw his tracks, not caring about the cold that was biting into my feet. I ran through the blizzard, my heart


    leaping when I saw his back, in his dark fur coat, “Theon!”


    He stopped in his tracks, and I ran over to him, brushing away my hair as the wind blew around us


    violently. He turned to look at me and I gave him a small smile, despite the cold that was sinking into my


    skin. “You left both keys.” I exined, holding it out to him. “One was in the door.” He nced down at


    my hand. I stood there, hand outstretched. He didn’t take it and I realised his hands were full. “Shall I put


    it into your pocket?” I offered, stepping closer. “No. I don’t need it. I left it on purpose.” He replied


    emotionlessly. My heart skipped a beat and fear began to settle into me. Don’t think negatively, Yileyna;


    he probably doesn’t trust it at the castle… or something… “Oh! Ok, um, what if youe when I’m not


    around or-” “I’ll knock on the door if I doe, but it’s not necessary. I no longer need the key. The ce


    is yours. Consider it a gift.” I frowned, confusion filling me. “Theon, you’re scaring me, it’s almost as if


    you’re noting back” I said with a small forced chuckle. He didn’t reply, he simply looked at me.


    “Theon?”


    You’re really scaring me. Say something. Silence ensued, only the sound of the screaming wind and my


    pounding heart filled my ears. “Like I said, as future Beta of this kingdom, I need to focus on that. I


    realised when we werete for training that I can’t afford to have distractions. I need space from anything


    that holds me back from reaching my full potential, and if that includes you, then so be it.” I felt as if


    someone had just wrapped their hands around my heart and were crushing it.


    He was leaving me. Goddess, he was leaving me. “L.. I’m sorry if I made youte, I promise I won’t do it


    again.” “You’re wasting my time right now; I have a meeting with the king in half an hour.” It felt as if he


    had just pped me across the face. I looked up into his eyes, my own stinging with hot tears that I


    refused to let fall. “I’m sorry.” I repeated softly, stepping away. He didn’t reply as he continued walking


    away, my own pain in my chest worsening.


    I felt alone. So, so alone. The fear of abandonment raged within me, mirroring the storm around me. The


    wind blew harshly, and I backed away, staring at his receding figure.


    Do I really mean nothing to you Theon? I was praying for him to turn around, just one look… one


    reassuring nod. To look at me and tell me he’ll be back But he didn’t. I backed away slowly, the pain in


    my chest stronger than ever, and when the first tear spilt down my cheek, I turned and ran back to the


    cabin. The one I had thought was our home. Once again, those that I loved had left me alone, in what


    was just a house… I stepped into the warmth, mming the door shut and locking it before I mped my


    hands over my mouth, muffling the painful sob that wracked my body. I looked around the small cabin.


    The fire was zing, casting warmth around the room. Memories of our time here consumed me. The


    table was gone… a reminder of that moment… The two chairs and a small makeshift table stood to the


    side, and there on the kitchen counter stood a single steaming mug of coffee. I walked over to it, wiping


    my tears away. Did Theon forget to have it? His coffee… I would miss it. I wrapped my freezing hands


    around it when my gaze fell to the sink, a matching mug sat in the sink and I looked down at the one in


    my hand.


    He had made it for me…


    A single tear sshed into the mug, and I wondered what was wrong with me that not even one person


    wanted to stay by my side? What had I done, that I deserved to be deserted? 2 I let go of the coffee


    mug, dropping to my knees and resting my head against the kitchen cab.


    I felt empty and alone.


    He said we would meet for training, right? It means something, right? The fact that he made coffee,


    surely I meant something to him… 1


    Right, Theon?


    Stop it Yileyna. I was only trying to make myself feel better, but the truth was that I just wasn’t enough.