<b>Chapter </b>214


    Amber’s POV


    +15 <b>BONUS </b>


    Julian’s words broke my heart. I didn’t really know what it was like to have a mother, so I could only imagine the pain of having one for so long just to lose her. I thought of my daughter, even in the future as an adult, trying to cope with the cope of my loss.


    Julian kept a steady gaze, looking at me, his face nker than usual. I knew the medicine was to me


    <b>for </b>some of it, but I thought the rest might be a kind of shock that could onlye from trying to process


    bad news.


    “I don’t know how long I will be gone,” he said, and I understood. For some, dying took a short amount of time. For others, it stretched out too long. Depending on the cause, the time frame would be different, if it


    could even be pinned down at all.


    “I wish I coulde with you,” I told him. I gave a thought or two to how that would work. “But we’re in a critical state right now with the clinics. I think we almost have the overcrowding under control. If I leave


    now, I’m afraid it will backslide and we will lose all of our progress.”


    “I’m sorry I have to go,” he said. “I thought about staying. If it was anyone but my mother, maybe I would.


    But with her…”


    <b>“</b>You need to be there,” I said. “I’m just sorry I can’t be with you.”


    We looked at each other, trapped in an impasse of sadness.


    Between us, I could feel a sort of longing… I missed him, even though he was still sitting in the chair


    across the table from me.


    “How are we going to tell Alice?” I asked.


    He ran a hand down his face, showing the most emotion I’d seen out of him in two full days. “I genuinely


    have no idea.”


    After some discussion, we decided that the best way to handle it was simply to tell her t out, and then help her deal with it in her own way.


    I went to her tutor’s and picked her up. In the car, she told me all about her day. It had been a good one, and she’d gotten a gold star on her reading worksheet. She was excited about the star and to show Julian the drawing she had made at the end of the day of the two of them riding an elephant.


    “And the baby is there, <i>too</i>!” she said, showing me the drawing at a stoplight.


    My heart broke for her already even before she knew.


    When we arrived back at the hotel, Julian was setting the table. He’d ordered Alice’s favorite meal from


    her favorite restaurant in town, likely to try to soften the blow.


    Alice ran right up to him to show him her sticker and her drawing.


    +15 <b>BONUS </b>


    “That’s wonderful, Alice,” Julian said, nodding approvingly at her sticker. Then he smiled at her drawing. The smile was forced, I knew the difference, but again I didn’t know if it was the pills or the weight of what he was facing that was holding back his emotions. “I love it. The elephants from the zoo?<b>” </b>


    “Yeah!” Alice seemed so proud of her drawing now that her father knew right away what it was.


    “Can I have this?<b>” </b>Julian asked.


    “Okay!<b>” </b>Alice seemed even prouder now.


    Julian smiled down at the picture, then set it aside on the table.


    “Alice. Sit down a minute. There’s something I need to talk to you about. Something serious,” Julian said, and gestured to one of the chairs for Alice to sit down.


    Obediently, Alice sat down. Julian sat beside her, turned on his chair so he was facing her. I sat on the chair at the other side of her, ready to offerfort if she needed it.


    <b>Chapter </b>215