Chapter 214 I’m Not Leaving
Chapter 214 I’m Not Leaving
TESSA
Tess?
Since when did he call me Tess?
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The sound of it still echoed in my ear, like a bell that wouldn’t stop ringing. It wasn’t even the name that got me–it was the way he said it.
I shook my head, trying to push it away.
I hade back for a reason, and as much as I wanted to stay to keep an eye on Arden until I was sure she was stable, there was someone else who needed me.
“Ca!” I eximed as soon as I saw her.
She was huddled on the porch of our small cabin, her tiny body shaking as she cried, and both Sol and Noelle were kneeling beside her, trying tofort her.
It felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest.
“Finally!” Noelle eximed when she spotted me, relief washing over her features.
I rushed forward, dropping to my knees in front of my daughter. “Baby…”
Ca’s tear–streaked face lifted to meet mine, and the moment her big, wet eyes saw me, she let out a sob and threw her little arms around my neck.
What was left of my heart shattered into a thousand pieces right then.
I wrapped her up in my arms, holding her close, rocking her back and forth. Her tiny hands fisted in the fabric of my jacket like she was afraid I’d disappear again.
“We really tried to console her,” Noelle said gently, guilt heard in her voice. “But you’ve been gone so often these days, Tessa. I think she can feel it.”
“I know,” I whispered, feeling the sting of guilt settle in my chest.
Chapter 214 I’m Not Leaving
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I’d been so focused on everything else that I hadn’t realized just how much Ca had been noticing my absence.
“I’m sorry, baby,” I murmured against her hair, kissing the top of her head.
But to my surprise, she pushed back, squirming out of my arms just enough to look at me with a pout that broke me even more.
“W–why?” she stuttered through little hups.
“Why what?” I asked softly, brushing her messy hair from her face.
Her lower lip trembled. “When mommy is gone… I don’t have a daddy like my friends.”
The air left my lungs in one sharp, painful rush.
The question I’d been dreading but knew woulde someday was finally here.
Ca was only four, but she already noticed the things I thought she’d be too young to understand.
My throat felt tight as I nced helplessly at Sol and Noelle.
They both looked ufortable, Sol rubbing the back of his neck and Noelle biting her lip.
“They say…” Ca huped again, her little voice cracking, “They say I have so many family, but I don’t have my daddy.”
Noelle’s face darkened. “Who told you that? Those damn children—”
“Noelle,” I muttered softly, stopping her before she could rise to her feet.
It wasn’t the other children’s fault. They didn’t know better. They were just curious.
I turned back to Ca, who was staring at me with eyes that begged me for answers I didn’t know how to give.
Chapter 214 I’m Not Leaving
My chest ached.
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How could I exin Rowan to her? How could I exin rejection and mistakes and the way I’d spent years convincing myself I could raise her alone?
I swallowed hard and gathered her into my arms again, kissing her damp cheek.
“I’m not leaving anymore, baby,” I said softly. It was the only response I could
muster.
Her little arms slowly circled my neck again, and this time she didn’t let go.
“I’ll be right here,” I whispered, as much a promise to her as it was to myself.
***
Three dayster, I still hadn’t left.
I had every intention of keeping my promise to Arden. But thest three days had been filled with Ca’s quiet stares and hesitant touches, as if she thought I might vanish if she looked away. So I stayed.
I stayed through breakfast with her every morning. I stayed through her silly chatter when she yed with her toys. I stayed when she fell asleep in myp, her little fingers curled in my shirt.
I told myself Arden would understand. She was surrounded by doctors and nurses, and had Cade there with her. I had convinced myself that she was fine.
But that illusion shattered the moment my phone rang after breakfast.
Arden’s name shed across the screen.
My stomach dropped.
I hesitated before swiping to answer, my heart pounding in my chest. “Arden?”
But it wasn’t her voice that came through.
14:55 <b>Sat</b>, Sep 6
Chapter 214 I’m Not Leaving
“Where are you?” Cade asked, sounding restrained.
I frowned, my grip tightening on the phone. “Why?”
There was a beat of silence before he said, “Arden is getting worse.”
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I shot to my feet so quickly my chair scraped loudly against the wooden floor. “What?”
“The nurses said they can’t feel the baby’s heartbeat,” Cade said.
The room spun.
“What do you mean they can’t feel it?”
“She’s vomiting too frequently,” he added grimly. “She can barely keep water down. The doctors are doing everything they can, but…”
I pressed a trembling hand to my forehead.
And to think, just this morning, I had been seriously considering not going back at all.
“Goodness,” I breathed, my chest constricting painfully.
Ca, who had been quietly coloring at the table, nced up at me with wide, worried eyes.
I turned away, biting my lip. This was a hard decision–one of the hardest I’d had to make since the day I ran away with Ca.
“Are you in the North?” I asked finally.
Please, I begged silently. Please say yes.
If they were in the North, then the n I have in mind might work.
“No,” Cade said. “We’re still here in the South. We’re waiting for her to recover before we travel again.”
Chapter 214 I’m Not Leaving
I swore under my breath, pacing across the room.
Gosh. Why would they still be where Rowan was?
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There was a pause, and when he spoke again, his voice cracked just enough for me to hear the fear underneath.
“Please, Tessa. Make it fast. I can’t lose them.”
In the background, I heard a faint, pained groan, and my chest clenched. That was Arden.
She wasn’t okay.
I shut my eyes, taking a slow breath.
This was no longer about whether I wanted to leave Ca or not.
This was about saving Arden–and her baby.
I lowered the phone, ending the call, and turned to see Ca watching me silently.
She just sat there, her coloring book forgotten in front of her, her eyes big and shining, waiting for me to say it.
My heart broke in two.
I crouched in front of her, brushing my thumb over her soft cheek.
Before I could even exin, she tugged gently at the hem of my shirt.
“Mommy leaving again?” she asked quietly.
I closed my eyes and exhaled shakily, then forced a small smile, hoping she couldn’t see the war going on inside me.
“Yes,” I said softly.
Her little face crumpled, and I hurried to add, “But you’reing with me.”
Chapter 214 I’m Not Leaving
Her head snapped up. “What?”
I nodded, brushing her hair behind her ear.
“You’reing with me, baby,” I repeated.