Chapter 211 Alive
Chapter 211 Alive
TESSA
In the end, Rowan ended uping with me.
Surely, he must be busy with Alpha work.
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Surely, there were matters more important than trailing after me like some oversized shadow. However, Arden had insisted hee to keep me safe, so here we were, walking through the uneven path near the river bend to grab some of the herbs.
My boots squished against the soil every time we stepped through softer patches of ground, and Rowan kept walking just behind me–close enough that I could hear every rustle of fabric and every shift of his breath.
He was watching my every step, reaching out to brush a branch out of my way before I even noticed it, steadying my elbow when the ground dipped, picking up loose twigs so I wouldn’t trip over them.
I stopped so abruptly that he nearly bumped into me. I turned around to re at him.
“Can you stop?” I snapped.
Rowan’s lips pressed into a thin line.
He exhaled sharply through his nose before muttering, “Sorry.”
I narrowed my eyes. Seriously, had he gotten soft?
I turned away quickly before he could see how off–bnce that had thrown me. I clicked my tongue and started walking again, forcing my focus on the path.
Since when did he apologize so easily?
What happened to the Rowan who pushed me away to the ends of the earth? Who used to re at me with those piercing eyes <b>as </b>though I was the biggest mistake he ever made?
<b>I </b>shook
my
head to clear it. I told myself it didn’t matter
But then he cleared his throat, and I knew something wasing.
“I think <b>it’s </b>also time <b>I </b><b>say </b>these things to you,” Rowan said.
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…
Chapter 211 Alive
:
My shoulders tensed, but I didn’t turn to look at him. I kept walking.
“The day you left,” Rowan said, sounding reluctant. “Dustin came to find me.”
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My breath caught, and for one moment, I nearly stumbled. But I didn’t stop walking. I didn’t know why I was listening to this–why I wasn’t cutting him off right now, telling him to shut <b>up </b>and leave the past in the past where it belonged.
“He told me everything,” Rowan continued. “From the day he met Ena to when you went to him and had an ident.”
My jaw clenched, and I stared straight ahead.
“I know it’s bad that I only realized it then,” he said. “But I’m sorry, Tessa. For everything. For turning a blind eye. For not listening to you. For rejecting you. For being the worst mate you could ask for.”
‘Damn right,‘ I thought, my grip on the strap of my bag tightening.
But still, I didn’t say anything.
The only sound between us was the crunch of leaves and twigs under our feet, the rush of the nearby river growing louder as we drew closer.
He kept talking.
“Ena was there with me during Elijah’s death,” Rowan said quietly. “She was the first one to make me feel seen. I guess that’s why I clung to her so much. But I could tell she was staying with me for the same reason—because she knew I needed someone. And now, I feel guilty for roping her into my grief.”
<b>I </b>swallowed hard.
“She actually told me that she wanted me to be with you,” Rowan went on. “I didn’t know how to feel about that. I always saw you in my peripheral vision, but you seemed more like a little sister. I couldn’t just leave Ena. My anger–it was supposed to be at myself–but I directed it toward you. For that, I am sorry. I know I can’t make it up to you, but I want to try.”
I frowned, not trusting myself to speak. Still, he wasn’t finished.
“I’m d Ena’s heart was given to you,” Rowan said finally, “You were both beautiful. You both deserved to live. But in that moment, you deserved to live. I’m sorry for not believing
you, Tessa.”
“I want to make it up to you in this lifetime, but even then, I wouldn’t know if it would be
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Chapter 211 Alive
enough.”
I stopped walking.
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The words hit something in me that I hadn’t been ready to face. I turned around to look at
him.
What I saw nearly made me step back.
He waspletely sincere. His eyes were open and pleading. It startled me so much that I actually stepped back. But the ground beneath my boot shifted unexpectedly.
My stomach dropped.
Rowan’s eyes widened as he lunged forward, reaching for me, but it was toote. My footing slipped, and in the next second, we both went tumbling down the curve of the path.
The world spun before the sound of water sshing engulfed our senses.
The icy river swallowed us both.
I gasped for air as we both resurfaced, Rowan holding onto my waist. He steadied me, allowing me to wrap my arms around his neck while he treaded his legs in the water.
I still couldn’t say anything, so we both stared at each other in silence for a moment.
I knew that sorries weren’t going to fix everything I went through.
They couldn’t erase the nights I cried myself to sleep, wondering why I wasn’t enough. They couldn’t undo the times I begged the Moon to take this bond away from me so I could breathe without feeling like I was being strangled by it.
And they certainly couldn’t bring back the part of me that Zaria had shattered.
Herughter still haunted me in my dreams sometimes. She was still there every time I thought of him, whispering that he would always choose her again if he had the chance.
But as I looked at Rowan now, water dripping from his hair, <i>his </i>shirt clinging to the hard lines of his chest, his <b>face </b>so unguarded… I wondered if he really meant it this time.
We were soaked through from the river, my clothes heavy, clinging to my skin. My breathing was shallow, ragged from the shock of the fall, but Rowan didn’t look away from me.
Instead, he reached out slowly, carefully, as though giving me a chance to stop him. His hand brushed against my temple before tucking a wet strand of hair behind my ear.
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Chapter 211 Alive
TO Free Coun
His fingers lingered for just a moment, warm even in the cool air, and then he murmured, “You’re so beautiful.”
“I’ll spend my whole life making it up to you.”
Something inside me leapt.
It was my wolf. She stirred so violently that I gasped out loud. She was there, in the back of my mind, pressing against me, demanding that I stop hesitating.
This was Rowan.
This was our mate.
I barely realized what I was doing until I was already moving forward, closing the space between us. My hands came up, fingers curling into the fabric of his soaked shirt, and then his mouth was on mine.
Rowan kissed me like a starving man. His lips were warm and firm against mine, tasting faintly of the river.
I made a sound—I wasn’t sure if it was a sob or a sigh—and his arm was suddenly around my waist, hauling me closer until my soaked body was pressed against his.
The kiss deepened, slow at first, before it turned urgent. Rowan’s hand cradled the back of my head, keeping me exactly where he wanted me.
I clung <i>to </i>him, my fingers gripping his shirt so tightly that my knuckles ached. I could feel his heartbeat against my chest, hard and fast, matching my own.
When he finally pulled back, just enough to breathe, his forehead rested against mine. His breath came in short, uneven bursts, and his thumb brushed over my cheek.
I realized I was crying, though I hadn’t even noticed the tears mixing with the river water on my face<b>. </b>
“Tessa,” he whispered. “Thank you.”
“Thank you for being alive.”