<spanng="EN">Analise’s POV


    <spanng="EN">I was at the car dealership before five that evening. I was d I knew what I was nning to get, and had grabbed the title to my car when I stopped by my condo. I dropped my duffle off in my office at Fashion Forward two hours ago. Gwen was stunned by what had happened. She was on my side, and my parents already called her to see if she knew where I was.


    <spanng="EN">I knew the security officer who was there wouldn’t know who I was. I didn’te there very often, and I didn’t want to stand there and argue with him. I just needed to drop off my things and see what I needed to get to sleep in my office for a week or two. I had a pretty nice couch in there, and I knew that I just needed a nket, and pillow, and maybe a sheet set. I would need a pillowcase. I was d to have a mini fridge in there as well.


    <spanng="EN">Gwen knew something was up, but she didn’t know what at the time. She had the guard take a picture of me with his cell phone and print it, so all the guards knew who I was and that I would be staying overnight to work for a little while. Gwen had answered my family honestly, telling them she hadn’t heard from me and didn’t know where I was. They would probably call her again tomorrow, but she wasn’t going to tell them where I had gone. She was pissed at Seth for telling my parents that I had to get married. I didn’t, things would blow over in a week when the next scandal broke. God forbid an inkling of a scandal involve the Caldwell name.


    <spanng="EN">They had been taking turns calling my phone. I had silenced it, tired of hearing it ring. They even pulled both sets of grandparents into it. My grandmother Wade was on my side. She was worried about me, and she was the only one to whom I replied out of all the calls and messages. She just wanted me to be happy, which was more than everyone else wanted.


    <spanng="EN">I always had someone telling me what to do. What home and car to get, and that I needed to hide my wealth. Well, I didn’t have to hide it anymore. Once the wedding arrives in less than three weeks, the whole city will know what a colossal mistake Roger had made. It wouldn’t be me getting embarrassed. He would be the one who threw everything away for someone unworthy.


    <spanng="EN">It didn’t take me long to pick my car out. I was drawn to it quickly. The men who worked there had dismissed me. I was at a Porsche dealership wearing a t–shirt and leggings, but the lone saleswoman had approached me when they passed me over. She had helped me for over an hour. She answered all my questions and insisted that although the Porsche Panamera was really fast, it wasn’t something I needed to be scared of.


    <spanng="EN">While speaking with her as we walked the lot. I discovered that she was a single mother whose son was about to attend college. He had been worried abouting back to visit, as they only had one car, and she would have to go get him and bring him back. I didn’t need the trade–in. My car had been well–maintained and had less than 70,000 miles on it. She tried to refuse, but I insisted. It was a safe, dependable vehicle. I knew he would take care of it.


    <spanng="EN">She called him to the dealership so he could thank me in person. One of his friends drove him up here, and he was excited about his new car. I handed him the title and the fobs and gave him a thousand dors cash for him to get his registration and insurance on it. He was ted, as this solved another issue for him and his mother. He was already nning on working a part–time job at school and would be able to pay his own insurance and upkeep with it. His schrships would cover the rest of what he needed. I’m just d that my car went to someone who needed it.


    <spanng="EN">The only question was which color to choose. I had learned that when I started gaining weight, not to pick anything shy. The included my makeup, clothes, and hair. I did nothing to draw attention to myself. There were several colors that drew my eye, but Wanda had watched me. She kept seeing my eyes go back to the Carmine Red and the Lugano Blue. I finally decided on the Frozen Blue Metallic. It wasn’t a bold statement, but it was a beautiful color for a beautiful car.


    <spanng="EN">“Analise, you mentioned that this was your very first time to pick out your vehicle. Don’t hide; a Porsche gets noticed no matter what color it is. You’ll never be able to just blend into the crowd. Own it. You need to pick the color that you love the most,” she told me.


    <spanng="EN">“I’ve heard that red cars get pulled over more than any other color,” I replied.


    <spanng="EN">That’s because most people who buy a red car don’t mind standing out. They want the attention. They are bold, just like their car. I think you will love the other colors too, but buy the one that you want. Not what you think others will approve of you buying. You’re the one paying for it, and you shouldn’t settle. You mentioned that you were getting your first taste of freedom, so disregard what you think anyone else might think, and make your choice. I do have one more color to show you. It had been pulled to the back as it was supposed to be sold, but her financing fell through as she had no proof of ie. I think it would be perfect for you,” Wanda replied.


    <spanng="EN">We walked to the area behind a fence, and gasped. She was right, this one was perfect. “This is the one,” I told her. I ran my hand gently down the vehicle. “What color is this?”


    <spanng="EN">“Montego Blue Metallic, and I agree, it’s beautiful. If I had the money, I would choose this color too. It attracts attention wherever it goes. It’s the only one like it on the lot. You would be the only one in the city with a car this color,” Wanda told me.


    <spanng="EN">“Sold,” I replied. She was happy for me, but it wasn’t because I had given her my old car. She had listened to me and helped direct me to what I wanted. I’m enjoying this taste of freedom. I’m taking control of my life now, and this is the first big step that I’m taking. All my friends had nice vehicles. I was the only one in our friend group to drive a car worth less than $30,000. My vehicle was a running joke among our friends, as i made more money than they did, but drove a basic car. I know that they are going to love it when they see my new ride.


    <spanng="EN">I paid $50,000 down on my car and will return with a cashier’s check tomorrow morning to pay off the bnce. I felt like a million bucks when I pulled off the lot. I loved my new car. It generated a lot of attention due to its striking color. I went to the mall to grab some new clothes. I had packed my underwear, but I hadn’t packed much else as I knew I was changing everything bout myself. I had been wearing a lot of bulky clothing to hide my weight loss. I had wanted to surprise Roger when he saw me in my wedding dress. But 1 didn’t want to hide anymore.


    <spanng="EN">I felt empowered as I tried on several outfits. I was still somewhat stuck in my heavier mindset. I still felt like who I used to be. Not who I am now. The salesperson helped me, and she was almost as enthusiastic about my weight loss as I was. She encouraged me to choose a few things that were outside myfort zone. Things I normally wouldn’t have tried, as I felt they wouldn’t have looked good on me. She actually had an eye for what looked best on me. I was stunned to see how I looked. I was still covered and professional, but I looked good. Much better than I did before. Roger felt I should always be modest and professional looking.


    <spanng="EN">Now I know that he just wanted me to cover up my plus–sized body.


    <spanng="EN">Yet he ended up marrying someone who was always scantily dressed. She was slimmer than I was, but the truth was that she was someone he was attracted to. I had put a lot of thought into itst night. I was not unattractive, and I was smarter and more talented than she was. I couldn’t figure out why he would choose her over me, other than the fact that he loved her. I couldn’t fight against that, so I would bow out of their rtionship gracefully. But I would prove to him that she was only with him for his money. Money that would slowly dwindle as hispany declined I felt like a weight had been lifted off of me. I loved so many of the outfits that I couldn’t decide and ended up choosing them all. I had allowed Roger to hold me down for too long. I had deferred to him way too many times. I’d done everything he wanted, all in order for him to love me. What a fool I had been, wanting something that had never belonged to me. He only wanted my help to achieve sess and win the woman he truly desired. That realization hurt pretty bad.


    <spanng="EN">I had hidden my true self away and became what he wanted me to be. It was never my wishes being carried out. I can’t believe how long I let him get away with it. I knew what it went back to. I just hadn’t wanted to admit that I had fallen in love with not one, but two unworthy men. That had to be some kind of record or something.


    <spanng="EN">I ended up with a whole new wardrobe. I then hit a shoe store and bought two new pairs of heels. Slimmer ones that didn’t have therger heels on the back like I had usually worn. I weigh less now, and the thinner heels are now easier to walk in. It was only seven, and the mall was slowing down on this Sunday night. I passed a salon before I turned and went back. My hair, although twisted up in a messy bun, had grown down to my butt. Roger liked my hair long, but I was done with doing anything Roger wanted anymore.


    <spanng="EN">I stepped into the salon. They had all been milling around, talking before I arrived. They were closing in an hour, and apparently, no one wanted to get a trim tonight. They smiled at me when I entered the store. They saw my bags, and I gave them the quick version of what I wanted to share. I had lost almost sixty lbs. and wanted a new look. They were thrilled to help me out. They asked what I wanted. I knew that I definitely wanted a cut, but didn’t know what else. I exined that I wanted to look like me, but a better version of me. They smiled and made suggestions, and I went along with them. I couldn’t wait to see the oue. The only thing I was sure of was that I wanted to shake things up.