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Sienna’s POV
The car kept moving, and I stared out the window, letting the blurred city lights be my escape from the tightness in my chest. I wasn’t here to relive the past, only tofort my son tonight. That’s it. At least, that’s
what I wanted to believe.
The roads we took were quiet now. Tall buildings loomed in silence, their shadows flickering across the window
I held onto. The cold from the AC mingled with the night air seeping through the vents, creating a biting
stillness that crept through the corners of my mind.
The fading sounds of the city as we moved farther from the center made me realize how unfamiliar this journey
felt, even though the route wasn’t new. A route that once felt like home-back when everything was whole.
Back when I sat in this seat not as a visitor, not as someone holding back-but as a part of them.
In the front seat, Liam stayed focused on the road, both hands gripping the wheel-too tightly, maybe. Tension
lined his jaw, his shoulders tensing slightly every time we hit a red light. He hadn’t said a word since we started
driving, but his silence spoke volumes. Of confusion. Of wounds not yet healed. Of all the things we never got to
say.
Emily, next to him, was still quiet. She leaned slightly toward the window, her face unreadable. I didn’t know
what she was thinking, and honestly, tonight I didn’t have the energy to care. I wasn’t here to fix anything with
anyone-only with my son.
Noah rested in myp, his body heavier now as sleep began to take him, but his fingers still gripped mine
tightly. There wasfort in that grip. A reminder that he was still small, that he still needed shelter, and how
close I hade to losing the chance to be that shelter because of a decision I once made.
I took a deep breath, trying to steady the rhythm of my heart. I didn’t know what would happen once Noah fell asleep. I didn’t know how to say goodbye without making him sad. But one thing was certain-I had to leave. I had to. Because if I stayed too long, I was afraid I might not want to go. And that kind offort… can be
poison.
The car turned into a residentialplex I knew all too well. Neatly paved roads, rows of trees nted in perfect symmetry, even the dim garden lights hadn’t changed. It all felt like a homing that should have warmed me-but instead, it chilled me to the bone. A cold that crept slowly from the soles of my feet to the pit
of my heart.
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We arrived at the house.
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My steps felt heavy as I walked across the marble floor that once felt so familiar. The air inside was still cool, clean, and scented with the faint fragrance of dried flowers-flowers Emily always reced every week. But it felt different now. Too foreign. Too quiet to be called my home anymore.
Liam opened the door first, letting me in while Noah clung tightly to my hand. Emily walked inst, said nothing, and disappeared into her room without a word.
I stood in the middle of the living room, silently taking everything in. The gray sofa I used to nap on when Noah was fussy was still there. The crystal vase on the ss table still stood in its ce, filled with fresh flowers now slightly wilted. But what struck me the hardest was the family portrait on the wall-me, Liam, and Noah. Hung back up again. A world that once held me in ce… and now pushed me out without a sound.
“Noah, let’s change and brush your teeth first,” I said softly, stroking his head.
He nodded and ran to his room. I followed behind him, just like I used to. Got his pajamas, helped him brush his teeth, wiped his little hands with a towel-our old nightly routine.
“Mommy, read me a story,” he said, climbing into bed and pulling the nket up to his chest.
I smiled and picked one of his favorite storybooks from the shelf titled The Rabbit’s Adventure in the
Mushroom Forest.
I sat beside him, reading slowly, my voice almost a whisper. Noah looked at me with half-closed eyes, still
fighting off sleep.
“Noah, are you sleepy? Let’s sleep now,” I said while gently stroking his hair.
But suddenly, he opened his eyes and looked at me with sadness. “Mommy, the red robot is broken.”
I paused for a moment, then nodded. “Yeah, Mommy heard. Auntie Emily didn’t mean to, right?”
Noah nodded, lips pouting. “That was Noah’s favorite robot… Mommy gave it to me.”
“I know, sweetheart.” I leaned down and kissed his forehead. “Mommy will buy you a new one, okay? The exact
same one.”
“Noah wants it from Mommy, not anyone else,” he mumbled.
“Mommy promises,” I whispered with a smile, though my heart sank.
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He rested his head back on the pillow. But just when I thought he’d fall asleep, he said again, “Read one more, Mommy… the one with the rabbit flying in a balloon.”
I sighed softly, then nodded. “One more, okay? Then sleep.”
So I read The Rabbit and the Hot Air Balloon. He listened, his eyes growing heavier. My voice was soft, slow, almost like a luby. When I finished thest line, I turned and saw him fast asleep-his breathing calm, arms folded on his chest, lips slightly parted just like they always were when he slept deeply.
Carefully, I ced the book back on the small table beside the bed. I stood up slowly, trying not to make any sound. But just as I turned around and began to step away, I felt a small tug at the edge of my shirt.
“Noah?” I whispered.
His little hand was still clutching my pajama shirt, and from his tiny lips moving in his sleep, I heard faintly,
“Don’t go…”
My steps halted.
I turned and looked at his peaceful sleeping face, but his hand hadn’t let go. Even though the words came from a
dream, they rooted me to the spot. I knew that when I truly leftter, I’d be leaving another wound in my son’s
heart.
Suddenly, my whole body felt heavy. I sat back on the edge of the bed, letting Noah keep holding onto my shirt. I
didn’t say anything. Just stared at his face, serene in sleep.
That night, I could only sit in silence. Letting the night wrap us in quiet and unresolved shadows.
Along with longing, an unhealed wound, and a love that still wanted to stay.
1:16 AM Tue 2 Sep