ROSETTE’S POV
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I couldn’t sleep once again. It was bing annoying. No matter how tired my mind and body were, I couldn’t bring myself to fall asleep.
I needed to be up early for work tomorrow, and my being awake by this time isn’t helping.
I sighed as I folded my arms and rested them on the cold stone of the top rail. This was where I had seen Kade earlier, and something about the way he had been smoking, his hair in a messy bun, and strands flying into his face, smoking his cigarette had screamed mncholy.
And what was even more strange was how my chest had tightened seeing him like that. And I wanted to reach out to him. Strange indeed.
The hair on the back of my neck stood on end, and I felt eyes on me. I slowly turned to see a figure standing there, his arms folded.
“You’re in my spot,” he grumbled, his raspy voice making me swallow.
I looked away from him and back at the night sky before I looked back at him. Then I turned and left the balcony. “Sorry.”
He looked like he hadn’t expected me to leave like that, and he looked conflicted. He cleared his throat, unfolding his arms and walking onto the balcony. “Stay if you want. It’s big enough to fit two people.”
I said nothing and just walked back to where I had stood, folding my arms and resting them on the rail, every cell in my body aware of how close he was to me. We stayed silent, just watching the stars, and I felt okay just being silent like this. No need for unnecessary talks.
But then a question slipped out, unexpected.
“Have you ever felt like you’d choke… if maybe, maybe you stayed still too long? Like if you stopped moving, stopped distracting yourself, everything in your head would just… swallow you whole?”
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That was unexpected. The questions had just flowed out, but I always felt this way. Like if I stood still, if I don’t move or don’t do anything the ck hole in my head might just swallow me whole. And I might loose the pieces of myself I was barely holding on to.
Kade doesn’t answer immediately. I risk a nce at him and find him staring at me–not with judgment, but with something unreadable. He exhales slowly, running his hand through his hair, but he seems to remember it was still tied up and stopped halfway.
“Yeah,” he says atst, his voice barely a whisper. “I feel that all the time.”
There’s no teasing in his voice. No mask of indifference. Just honesty.
My chest tightened, and I looked away from him. “Guess we’re both running from something.”
“Isn’t everybody?”
Silence again. But this time it’s heavier, thicker. I felt him watching me, and he couldn’t help but ask, “What are you running from, Kade? Or who?”
His jaw flexes. “You wouldn’t understand.”
“Try me.”
Kade turns to face me fully now, his mismatched eyes glinting under the moonlight. “You ask dangerous questions, Rosette.”
“And you give cowardly answers.”
The words slip out before I can stop them. His eyes darken–not with anger, but with something hot. Kade steps closer, close enough for me to feel the heat rolling off him. His voice drops.
“You want honesty? Fine. I’m running from myself, Rosette. From my pain, my selfish desires, my greed. Myself!” He paused, his chest heaving. “I have to, because these things have destroyed me once and they can definitely destroy me again. I can destroy myself again.”
I tilt
my
head slightly, eyes locking on his. He looked like he needed to say that. To
13:01 Mon, Sep <b>8 </b>
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<b>81 </b>
55 vouchers
get that out of his chest before it suffocated him. His shoulders slowly came down, the frown between his brows smoothing.
He looked away, turning and resting his back and his elbows on the rail, looking upwards and closing his eyes. “I needed that. To let that out.”
“Yeah.” I mirrored his position but I didn’t close my eyes. “Why don’t you let your hair down?” I tensed, remembering Axel had asked me that question hours ago.
“It gets in the way,” he answered, repeating my exact same answer.
A smallugh burst from me before I could even stop it, shocking the two of us. Kade opened his eyes and stared at me. I just stared ahead, my heart racing. What was thest time I heard my ownughter? Have I ever?
“Was what I said funny?”
I shook my head. “No. I just… Axel asked me that same question and I gave him the exact answer.”
Kade said nothing after that, looking forward. “You’re both close, huh?”
Close…? Were we? I feltfortable with Axel, I’ll admit. He just had this… air around him. I couldn’t help but feel calm anytime he was close. On the ride here, he hadn’t stopped talking even when I stayed silent. He just talked and talked,ughing at his own jokes.
“And now you’re smiling,” Kade scoffed, and my head snapped to him, my eyes wide.
“I wasn’t smiling.” Was I? I… I didn’t know.
“Sure<i>.” </i>He pushed away from the rail, walking away.
“Wait!” I shouted and he paused, looking over his shoulder at me. He raised an eyebrow, waiting. Why had I stopped him? I didn’t have anything to say. “Uhm… It’s nothing. Good night.”
He stood staring at him, unblinking. Then he turned, walking away. But then he stopped, standing still with his back facing me, his shoulders tensed. He cursed softly, turning and walking towards me.
“What-”
…
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Before I could evenplete the words, he held my waist, pulling me flush against me, mming his lips on mine. I gasped into his mouth, caught off guard, but I immediately kissed him back, pressing myself to him even though I was already close enough.
Something about the men just seems to bring out the… lustful side to me. I couldn’t exin it. Didn’t understand it, and it was driving me crazy. I don’t know how I feel around Kross because we have spent barely five minutes in each other’s presence. But Kade and Axel? I know that they drive me crazy. They make me… feel things. And it’s weird. It’s weird and I love it so damn much.
Like Axel had said earlier about his addiction to me, this wouldn’t end well.
One of Kade’s hands squeezed my ass, and he deepened the kiss, his tongue slipping into my mouth.
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13:01 Mon, Sep <b>8 </b>