Chapter <b>136 </b>


    Then, I decide to take a walk outside. It’s a nice night out and I take advantage of the quiet to try and calm my restless thoughts. If I’m being honest with myself, Talia really is nice. Everything she said today and this evening made it clear that she and Christian are just friends. Besides her wrapping herself around him when she first arrived, she’s been perfectly–lovely. So why does my heart not seem to care about that?


    I realize that tonight is the first night that I’ve been alone in weeks and I don’t feel like crying. Maybe being with Christian thest couple of weeks has helped me work past the initial grief of losing my parents. Or maybe dealing with the people who were responsible for their deaths gave me the closure I needed. Either way, I know I won’t be crying when I go to bed tonight.


    I make my way back to the packhouse and I’ve just stepped onto the patio when I hear him.


    “Did you work things out in your head?” Christian asks.


    I jump, my heart feeling like it’s about to leap out of my chest.


    “Holy Mother Moon Goddess, Christian! Are you trying to give me a heart attack?” I ask, clutching my chest.


    He steps out of the shadows and walks toward me.


    “I wanted to make sure you were okay. Why didn’t you join us tonight?”


    “You know why,” I say.


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    “Do you not believe either of us when we say that we’re just friends?”


    he asks.


    a


    “I believe you, but that doesn’t mean that I like watching you bepletely different person with her than you are with me,” I say.


    He pulls me into the shadows with him, leaning against the wall and pulling my body against his.


    “I meant what I said tonight about being responsible for you and Shane,” he says.


    “Yeah, I got the part about us being a job,” I say and he growls.


    “I KNEW that would be the only part of that you picked up on. That’s not what I meant. I have a responsibility to both of you. But Enya, my responsibility to you ends before my responsibility to Shane does. Once you’re settled, once you have a clear path to follow, I won’t feel the same level of responsibility for you any longer.”


    “What does that mean, Christian?”


    “It means that you’ll get to see the side of me that Talia sees. It means that if you still want more from me, then I would be much more open to a rtionship with you. Once you’re an adult and I’m no longer in the position of being your guardian like I am now, I would be willing to explore whatever it is that you’d like to explore between us,” he


    says.


    I look into his eyes, seeing the truth of what he’s saying. Nine months feels like forever, but if that’s what it takes to get what I want from Christian, then I have something to look forward to.


    “Okay, Christian.”


    “Good. Come on, let’s get you to bed,” he says, leading me upstairs.


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    I insist on a goodnight kiss, not that he takes much convincing. The kisssts and I’m craving more, but before I’m ready for him to leave, he pulls away,


    “Goodnight, Enya.”


    “Goodnight, Christian.”


    The next morning, I get up as usual and go to warrior training. Christian puts Shane with Talia and I immediately see why she’s


    number five on the leaderboard. She’s an incredible warrior. She’s fast, intelligent in her fighting, and when she takes you down, she takes you down hard.