Xena''s POV
"I would stay with you, but you seem like you need space. Logan said to give you space." Ryder''s voice carried uncertainty as he stood a few feet away.
I bit my lip, emotions churning inside me. What I needed wasn''t distance, but
understanding. “Not that kind of space. Just... physically be near me, but wait for
me to
reach out forfort when I''m ready."
"Oh."
I caught the sh of hurt in his eyes and immediately felt guilty. "I''m sorry, I didn''t mean to make you feel bad."
"I''m just learning how to help you. Really know you. Don''t apologize," he said, his green eyes sincere as he carefully sat beside me, leaving enough room between
us.
I gave him a small smile. "You''re doing fine."
We sat infortable silence for a few minutes, the gentle evening breeze rustling through the trees surrounding the training field.
"How''s your arm feeling?" he broke the silence.
"Hurts a bit, but it''s okay."
Ryder sighed, interrupting my thoughts. "A birthday party on Friday seems inappropriate given everything."
I forced myself back to reality. "It''ll give people something to look forward to after Samuel''s funeral." Even saying it made my heart ache. Life and death, joy and grief, alling so suddenly.
"I didn''t send flowers," I frowned, the realization hitting me suddenly.
"Logan took care of it. I asked," Ryder replied.
He always thought of things I missed. "Thank you."
"The funeral''s tomorrow at 10 AM," Ryder sighed.
"Yeah..."
"Ama got you.a dress."
"Of course she did." I let out a smallugh, thinking about how Ama always took care of
these details.
"We should arrive separately. Ama will pick you up early, you can sit together as a group. William and I will be in the back if you need us."
"Thanks for understanding." I genuinely appreciated that he wasn''t insisting on staying by my side.
"Just make sure youe back to me after," Ryder sighed, his possessiveness starting to show through.
"Okay," I agreed softly.
"Come on, you need to eat something before bed." Ryder stood up but didn''t reach for my hand, respecting my boundaries.
"I''m not hungry." The thought of food made my stomach turn. Grief seemed to swallow my appetite.
"Try? Please?" His eyes were full of concern.
"Fine." I sighed and stood up.
We walked together, stars beginning to appear in the night sky. When we entered the pack house, Ryder led me straight to the private dining room where two tes of pasta were waiting. I managed about a quarter of mine before setting my fork down and leaning back in my chair.
"I''m done."
"Okay." Surprisingly, Ryder didn''t argue, just stood up.
We went directly to the bedroom, where he started looking for a movie. I grabbed
a set of silk pajamas and changed in the bathroom. When I came out, Ryder had chosen a film and
was wearing only shorts.
We climbed into bed. The TV had been moved to the foot of the bed. Ryder adjusted the pillows so he was half-reclined. He held out his arm and I curled up beside him, my head resting on his chest as he pulled me close before pressing y.
I was asleep before the title appeared. The next morning, I woke to the sound of text messages on Ryder''s phone. He rolled over to respond.
"Who is it?" I mumbled groggily.
"Dad."
"What time is it?"
"S:10."
I tried to wake myself up, feeling the heaviness of the uing funeral settling in
my chest. "I should get up and shower. When is Amaing?"
"In thirty minutes," Ryder yawned.
As Ryder put his phone down, I started to get up, but he caught me and pulled me back to him.
"Not so fast."
"Oh?" I looked at him questioningly.
"How are you feeling? I wish we hadpleted the mate bond already so I wouldn''t have
to ask."
I took a moment to assess my emotions, finding them tooplicated to sort through. "I''m not sure. Sad... confused. Maybe guilty too." Each emotion ebbed and flowed like waves, making it impossible to settle on just one.
"This isn''t your fault,” Ryder cupped my face, looking directly into my eyes.
"Mm." I avoided his gaze, guilt still clinging to me.
"I mean it. Head up today. I''m here if you need me." His voice was firm but gentle.
"Thank you," I whispered, feeling a small warmth in my chest.
Ryder gave me a soft kiss, leaving my lips tingling.
"Feel that?" he asked, watching me touch my lips.
"Yes, what is that?" A strange sensation spread from my lips throughout my body.
"The mate bond. I''ve been feeling it since yesterday."
"My eighteenth birthday isn''t until tomorrow," I said, surprised yet hopeful.
"William said he felt a milder version of the bond the day before Ama turned eighteen."
"Oh..." My mood brightened slightly, finally having some rity. Amid all the chaos, the
certainty about our bond provided a smallfort.
"Oh?" Ryder raised an eyebrow.
"I thought the bond would hit full force the moment of my birthday. I didn''t realize there was a gradual process."
"I didn''t either. William said he knew Ama was his mate the moment he saw her.
Remember how obsessed he was?"
"Yes, I remember." It had happened in my shop. The memory felt nostalgic, as if it had been ages ago.
"Are you uneasy?" he asked.
"About what?" I questioned.
"About being my mate?" His voice held a hint of uncertainty.
"No." I shifted so my forehead was pressed against his. "I''m just processing
everything. If I
had doubts, I wouldn''t have given myself to you."
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